Episodes

Did Kinsey drink all the scotch or did Jack? How does no one notice the super-obvious surveillance vehicles?? Where did all these hagfish come from??? Is that really it for the Trust and Kinsey???? Vodka or gin????? So many unanswered questions.

No one but John Sheppard can save Atlantis. He will do anything he can--disobey his boss, needlessly put a bunch of people in danger. Anything.

There's some blasphemy, some bad descriptions of Medieval Europe, and it takes us 20 minutes just to get to credits. We're on our A game!

Team FRTS drifts off in all directions with one particularly loud one becoming very offensive to a newly awoken wraith. Meanwhile, Kathy and Mary lose their minds trying to figure out how a life signs detector quantifies life signs.

We get introduced to Vala. Another strong female character. But unlike Sam or Fraiser, she's kinda the worst. Additionally, Kathy and Mary debate at length over just how slimy the inside of a used super soldier's armor would be. It may be more in ...

Team FRTS is silent but deadly as three of the four members sneak around the city. Meanwhile Rodney loves when a plan comes to together. Especially when it's his plan.

Sam just can't resist giving computer access to any rando that wants it. At least Teal'c is there holding the Big Gun with his big guns for protection. Meanwhile, Jack's off having dreams about two Sams. Fun Fact: This episode is the winner of Ca ...

Earth people: Like us, even though we woke up all your deadliest enemies and bring guns to peaceful negotiations! Everyone: No. Earth people: How could you betray us like this? Everyone: Because you woke up all our deadliest enemies and bring g ...

PWalter's caught getting coffee when sh*t goes down in the gate room. Siler manages to avoid injury for once. Daniel is very bad at stealthy rescue missions, but fortunately Teal'c's got it covered. No thanks to Jack who hesitates to act if it jeo ...

FRTS finds a not-at-all-silent-but-deadly gas that can power the gate enough to bring the crew home. But if there is anything wrong, surely our buddy, Shep, will figure it out.

We discuss the logistics of keeping horses 26 stories underground. How many horses can you fit down there? Do they get to go to the surface to graze? How well do they fit on the elevators? How smelly is it? Also there's some lovers' spats but th ...

There's negotiations and trade and surprises and betrayal, but most importantly there's Chief Miles Edward O'Brian! Nice!

A billionaire builds an Asgard! Thor is actually available for once! Mary is cool with being a Borg if it improves her marathon time!

We spend more time talking about dip, Steves, and montages than is probably reasonable. There's some Stargate stuff in there too.

What catches more attention than a gold forehead tattoo? Being a giant man dressed like you just stepped out of the 70s and taking down a bunch of thugs with a large audience of bystanders. In other news, Pete used his stalking skills for good this t ...

We're gonna go out on a limb here, but we're pretty anti-suicide and anti-child-labor. Thankfully the SG Atlantis team is too.

Hopeless Teal'c is a sad thing to see, but of course the rest of the team has his back. And Kathy is willing to scare the crap out of people for altruistic purposes so she's got our backs too.

The Earth People and the Athosians don't trust each another. Who could have guessed that? We could. We guessed that.

A devastating war has broken out on a planet. But who cares about all that death and destruction? All that really matters is how it all affects Daniel.

A bunch of stuff happens but none of that is important. All that matters is that we finally learn what happened to the back of Kawalsky's head.

Jack struggles with his new job. Dr. Lee struggles with a giant plant. Some random delegates struggle with negotiations. Ba'al struggles with getting Camulus handed over to him. Life is hard at the SGC.

This episode seems very familiar. Don't they have any A"new"bis ideas?

Oh no! A smoke monster! No, not that one from lost. No, not that one from an upcoming episode of Stargate Atlantis. A different one. Secretly made from slime instead of smoke.

We've made some new friends, so does it really matter that we've released a terrible scourge on the galaxy?